You may wonder what I expect of you. Chances are that, already, I have overblown your proverbial balloon with 200-ton expectations and a heaping mountain-sized dose of blind optimism. My bad.2012 was something like hell for me. While it had its high tides, its low blows seemed near fatal, at times, and mostly just... well, depressing. So, yes, the dawning of a new calendar on my wall [the 2013 I Can Has Cheezburger LOLCat Calendar, to be precise] has my eyes a-glitter with some serious hope. This just HAS to be the year they invent affordable jet packs or a Transatlantic tunnel.
You know... I had so many expectations for last year—so many goals and resolutions that I never got to. I mean, I could spend all day listing the personality flaws that need fixin', the calories I should be cutting and margins of productivity I wanted to conquer, but I'll refrain to save you some jive bitching. [I really should take up drinking or something...] Anyhow, let's face it;
you kind of sort of owe me one. No?
In ranting and raving about the year past, let me also note that I'm not the only one with a steamship full of disappointments [sinking ship?]; it appears 2012 wasn't a bitch for just me. Nearly everyone I talk to had a shitty year, too. 2012 was amaze with separations, sicknesses, deaths, moves and heated political debates. I realize most years have ups and downs, but last year, in my rear-view mirror and the mirrors of many others, those 365 days smarted some sick-nasty destruction. Personally, by December, I was rooting for the promised end of civilization [See: End of the World.]
In conclusion: you should be preparing for a stellar year. We deserve it! [If it takes a dozen or so HJ's to accomplish this, I'm willing. Just sayin.]
Sincerely, your friend,
mt
In an attempt to keep my resolutions both optimistic and generic, I drew a doodle to commemorate:
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| Thank you, Instagram! [Follow me: 1flychicken] |
...Oddly enough, it's only January 7th and already I received my first speeding ticket, fallen down the icy stairs and hurt myself, had about three zombie dreams aaaaaand got my period. Really, 2013? Can we try a little harder...?
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